THE GASM

I’m not going to write an extensive and thoughtful essay about the Eve/Cena story today. It’s late and I want to go to bed. I’ll wait a few days and see how the dust settles before picking it apart and putting all my thoughts back together again. But I’ve been thinking about it all afternoon and through the evening. What’s surprised me more than anything, is how genuinely upset I am about the whole thing. 

Every Tuesday morning I pick my phone up in bed and scroll back through the Raw live tweeting to see what I’ve missed. Every week someone declares it the worst Raw ever, and every week I tend to disagree. This morning I thought it was no different. During the afternoon, very sensible people still seemed very angry, which I took as a bad sign. If you’ve slept on it and wrestling is still making you angry, something terrible has happened. 

If you’re old enough to have had a relationship of any decent length, and I am, you’ve probably been unfortunate enough to have had a really shitty boyfriend/girlfriend/husband/wife. You know the kind. The type of guy or girl where your friends and family all ask “Why the hell are you wasting your time with this loser?” And you love them, so you defend them. “You only see the bad bits. When it’s good, it’s great. It’ll be fine when they’ve sorted themselves out. You don’t understand them like I do. They’re just going through a transition period.” Really, you’re just buying time hoping they do get their shit together. 

That’s kind of how I’ve felt about the WWE at times. Especially as a woman. Here’s the thing though, not just as a woman, but as an intelligent adult, I’m seriously running out of excuses. I can’t apply one set of principles to every other activity I’m involved with and excuse the WWE because I really love the times when it’s great. I feel like a hypocrite.  Part of me is hoping there’s a huge apology coming, like after John Cena’s anti-gay comments last year. Like a “Sorry, honey. Everything’s cool now. I won’t do it again. Forgive me?” Another part of me hopes there won’t be an apology, because at least then I won’t feel let down and embarrassed when they pull the same shit next time. 

Goodnight. 

 -Rae